You can’t imagine it, the singer remarks. There she was gearing up for her comeback record in eight years, ecstatically in love with her newish partner, and finally the mother of a toddler after facing fertility challenges for ten years, feeling invincible. Then in spring she was diagnosed with a breast cancer diagnosis.
The musician, actual name Jess Cornish, is known for being brutally honest. The record, her latest release, was supposed to be an transparent story, addressing every moment of pain she’d endured since she last made an album (endometriosis, pregnancy loss, failed relationships, gaslighting, suicidal thoughts) with characteristic openness. The lead track, No Secrets, was released in the spring. But by then there was a mighty secret. Her diagnosis. Later second single, the upbeat Living My Best Life, came out in late spring and she was speaking publicly about how she was enjoying life to the fullest, while still secretly dealing with breast cancer. Four weeks after she went public, and in the start of summer she had a mastectomy.
She offers me her best “What the fuck?” glance. “I put out with a song called the track No Secrets. I’m conducting every interview, and they inquire, ‘Any updates?’ and I’m, like, ‘Well, not much…’” she has just had to cancel tour dates because she’s awaiting cosmetic procedures.
We meet at a photography studio in London. She is sporting a tan faux-leather coat, jeans with elaborate white patches, cream boots and large glasses. Imagine rocker vibe meets vintage look. “It seems like I’m in the 1970s and I should have a boyfriend with a big tache.” Easy Rider, I say, recalling the film. “That’s what people called me at school!” She beams. She is fast-thinking, irreverent and blunt. She says she has always been interested in humor and is aiming for her first comedy performance next year. “I love making people laugh. During performances I basically roast the audience.”
Personal Battles and News
The artist was getting ready for an slot at the Baftas when she found a lump. “I promptly visited to get it examined, had an ultrasound, and they were, like, ‘It appears fine; your tissue is healthy.’ And I insisted, ‘However, it’s there. My arm hurts and pins and needles in my hands whenever I rise.’ And they suggested, ‘We should biopsy it?’ That was 28 March, the day after my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The specialist told her if it was bad news she’d call on the Monday. By then the singer had convinced herself it was nothing. The way she describes it, it was inopportune to face illness when she had so much on.
“Just two weeks before from debuting the project after eight years without an album and an extended break. And she contacted me and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I thought, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I join the call expecting it’s all going to be positive, and she informs me, ‘Are you sitting down?.’ You know that sad tone they use? And she says, ‘I regret to inform you but your biopsy results have indicated high-grade cancer cells.’” What did you say? “I replied, ‘That’s unfortunate. What awful timing.’ The first thing I thought was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She viewed the procedure frightening and surreal. “I dislike anesthesia. You’re escorted. During crises you roll down in a bed, but now I just walked with a hospital gown and my bum hanging out. Like a dystopian scene.” But, she notes, she’s been fortunate. No chemotherapy or radiation, just the surgery. “Cancer is awful, but yet Thank fuck I found it early. I underwent removal a few months back and my one side now resembles a odd shape.” A further beam. “The nipple was preserved.”
The follow-up procedure is for health and appearance. Her chest, she observes, are now “asymmetrical. They didn’t do an implant as small as my original. How rude! I felt, why make it worse, I’m already having a hard period. How offensive! Amusingly I said I’d never get my boobs done because I’ve got obsessive tendencies, and I know they’d never be flawless. Illness changed that.”
A History of Health Challenges
Cornish is familiar with health problems. She believes her outlook on her diagnosis has been so positive because she’s experienced in medical emergencies. Frequently they align with career highs, acting as a reminder, or blow, to remind her not to assume everything is fine. “Frankly, I feel the universe whispers, ‘Enjoying yourself? Sit down.’ Since childhood, it has often paired with achievements for me; something severe or obscure has affected my well-being.”
She takes me back to her youth, already making her debut performing in the stage in a musical (she was chosen at the age of nine). That’s when she was told about the heart condition Wolff-Parkinson-White syndrome, which can cause a rapid pulse as well as lightheadedness and palpitations. “I attended rehearsals intermittently on an intravenous line, and returning to the hospital at night.” She fast-forwards several years, and young Jessica has joined the trio Soul Deep while enrolled in the Brit School. “I signed my initial contract, and I had a stroke. Then when I was planning to release songs in recently I had a car crash and my larynx moved up and I was unable to vocalize for a twelve months.”
Wow, I say, slow down, I can’t keep up. A stroke so young? She nods|agrees
